bob vs. nature

Im always interested in knowing what peoples views are about adult toys. I come across many people who are afraid to talk about it, let alone think about it. One of my favorite R&B artist, Raheem DeVaughn, has a song called B.O.B, meaning battery operated boyfriend. In his song he talks about how a real man is better than a b.o.b. He has a few valid points. But I don’t know any man that would disagree with him. After listening to his song, I questioned whether Raheem was right. Now don’t get me wrong I enjoy a strong manly man’s loving just as much as the next straight woman. But when I’m not in a monogamous relationship, the real type of love that Raheem sings about is very much absent in my life. And single or not the body wants what the body wants. So in my opinion bob is sometimes better than the real thing. There are many benefits to having a bob. 1. You don’t have to worry about low performance. 2. There is no worry of sexually transmitted diseases. 3. No worries about satisfaction. I mean those are just a few among many, but you can see where I’m going. When a woman isn’t in a relationship, she should be free to perform self pleasure without the worries of someone else judging or looking down on her. Of course she isn’t going to be announcing it to the world, but among a group of girlfriends she should feel free. This topic is one that will forever be debated among men and women forever. Just thought Id put my opinion in.

Peace

Nikki

30 Things Every Woman Should Have And Should Know by 30

By 30, you should have …

1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you’ve come.

2. A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in your family.

3. Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.

4. A purse, a suitcase, and an umbrella you’re not ashamed to be seen carrying.

5. A youth you’re content to move beyond.

6. A past juicy enough that you’re looking forward to retelling it in your old age.

7. The realization that you are actually going to have an old age — and some money set aside to help fund it.

8. An email address, a voice mailbox, and a bank account — all of which nobody has access to but you.

9. A résumé that is not even the slightest bit padded.

10. One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry.

11. A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra.

12. Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.

13. The belief that you deserve it.

14. A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine, and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don’t get better after 30.

15. A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship, and all those other facets of life that do get better.

By 30, you should know …

1. How to fall in love without losing yourself.

2. How you feel about having kids.

3. How to quit a job, break up with a man, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.

4. When to try harder and when to walk away.

5. How to kiss in a way that communicates perfectly what you would and wouldn’t like to happen next.

6. The names of the secretary of state, your great-grandmothers, and the best tailor in town.

7. How to live alone, even if you don’t like to.

8. Where to go — be it your best friend’s kitchen table or a yoga mat — when your soul needs soothing.

9. That you can’t change the length of your legs, the width of your hips, or the nature of your parents.

10. That your childhood may not have been perfect, but it’s over.

11. What you would and wouldn’t do for money or love.

12. That nobody gets away with smoking, drinking, doing drugs, or not flossing for very long.

13. Who you can trust, who you can’t, and why you shouldn’t take it personally.

14. Not to apologize for something that isn’t your fault.

15. Why they say life begins at 30

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this is me..

yes i wear glass ALL the time. no i wont ever wear contacts. yes i enjoy cooking, gardening, and blogging. no that will never change. yes i prefer wearing flats over heels. yes my hair is kinky, coily, and sometimes wilder than me. yes at times im awkward. yes im black. yes i watch sappy movies.yes i love hard. and sometimes to a fault. yes i enjoy going to festivals, museums, and thrift stores. yes i like to bake and make homemade gifts. yes i go out of my way to make others smile. im not selfish. yes i tell too much sometimes. yes i enjoy talking a lot. yes im a vegetarian. yes i know im going to be be a magazine editor one day. yes i fantasize about living my life like Sid Shaw and Nina Mosley. yes i dance in the elevator when im alone. 

no you wont find me with my ass, legs and breasts hanging out, just to get attention. no you wont see me spending/living beyond my means just to impress people. no you wont see me bragging about what i have and what others don’t have. no you wont see me turn my back on people that i love the most. no you wont catch me backing down from anything or anyone. and no you wont catch me putting my dreams on hold for anyone. 

this is me. dominique ingram. awkward. black. ambitious. goofy. take or leave it. but im not going to change. 

peace 

nikki

Never ignore a person who loves and cares for you. One day you may realize that you’ve lost the moon while counting the stars.

Stephanie David Thoreau

currently being abused by socks…

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My mini organic veggie garden.

people you dont want to piss off (incomplete list)

your hairdresser/ barber

the mailman 

anyone preparing your meals

your IT guy 

an Asian

a black woman 

a baby 

your Gynecologist  

your butcher

your accountant 

your professor 

the UPS man 

a protester 

im in dance cardio class and there are about 20-25 people in the class. im positioned in the center right side of the classroom with 3 people on my left, 1 person in front of me, 2 behind me and 1 on the left. class starts and i feel a sweaty hand caressing my left hand. i awkwardly look at this chick giving her the “bitch move” stare. she on the other hand is so concentrated on trying to get her nonexistent hips to roll that she doesnt even notice me looking at her. through every song (which was about 5) this chick refused to move to her left, where she had 2 peoples worth of space next to her. yes i couldve moved to avoid all of this, but i was there first. and yes, thats childish but so what. as class went on i got annoyed with the constant contact of sweaty hands so i moved a few inches forward, putting me uncomfortably closer to the persons ass in front of me. there is 15 minutes left in class, im tired, annoyed and hungry. so i leave. 

i just Starbuck the shit of Nina’s ego.

ABG

that awkward moment when

you’re in the elevator alone, booty popping, then you get caught

that awkward moment when...

you try to flirt with a guy you like, do a sexy walk away, then trip

WHERE THE FUCK IS MY STAPLER!!!!!!

ABG

bitch i don’t know your life

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xH6Fmb8gexo?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0&w=500&h=281]

My Favorite ABG episode!

(Source: http://www.youtube.com/)

Life's Instructions

Found this on StumbleUpon.. my favorites are in bold. 

1. Have a firm handshake.


2. Look people in the eye.


3. Sing in the shower.


4. Own a great stereo system.


5. If in a fight, hit first and hit hard.


6. Keep secrets.


7. Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.


8. Always accept an outstretched hand.


9. Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.


10. Whistle.


11. Avoid sarcastic remarks.


12. Choose your life’s mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 per cent of all your happiness or misery.


13. Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out.


14. Lend only those books you never care to see again.


15. Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that they have.


16. When playing games with children, let them win.


17. Give people a second chance, but not a third.


18. Be romantic.


19. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.


20. Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life-and-death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems.


21. Don’t allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It’s there for our convenience, not the caller’s.


22. Be a good loser.


23. Be a good winner.


24. Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret.


25. When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go.


26. Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born.


27. Keep it simple.


28. Beware of the person who has nothing to lose.


29. Don’t burn bridges. You’ll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river.


30. Live your life so that your epitaph could read, No Regrets


31. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on life, you’ll regret the things you didn’t do more than the one’s you did.


32. Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.


33. Remember no one makes it alone. Have a grateful heart and be quick to acknowledge those who helped you.


34. Take charge of your attitude. Don’t let someone else choose it for you.


35. Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes.


36. Begin each day with some of your favorite music.


37. Once in a while, take the scenic route.


38. Send a lot of Valentine cards. Sign them, ‘Someone who thinks you’re terrific.’


39. Answer the phone with enthusiasm and energy in your voice.


40. Keep a note pad and pencil on your bed-side table. Million-dollar ideas sometimes strike at 3 a.m.


41. Show respect for everyone who works for a living, regardless of how trivial their job.


42. Send your loved ones flowers. Think of a reason later.


43. Make someone’s day by paying the toll for the person in the car behind you.


44. Become someone’s hero.


45. Marry only for love.


46. Count your blessings.


47. Compliment the meal when you’re a guest in someone’s home.


48. Wave at the children on a school bus.


49. Remember that 80 percent of the success in any job is based on your ability to deal with people.


50. Don’t expect life to be fair.

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Happy Friday!!

clamminess at its finest

i have always had clammy hands. not to the point where they are soaked, but just enough to bother me. and enough for me to have to drag my hands along my pants once or twice a day. i didnt think it was a problem, i actually thought it happened to everyone. you know when you’re nervous, hot, when you’re typing, and even eating hot food your hands sweat. normal right? well…

anywho, i was talk to Ivory (my cousin) the other day and was complaining about how clammy my hands were. She, being the detective that she is, quickly looked up information on exactly what my hands problem was. here are the details:

Name: Palmar Hyperhidrosis

Cause: Primary cause of Palmar Hyperhidrosis is unknown, but there are some surgeons that claim it is caused by sympathetic (haha sympathetic) over activity. Also, nervousness or excitement can intensify the clamminess.

Possible Treatments:

1. Aluminum Chloride- stuff used in deodorant


2. Botox- which you would have to get every 4-9 months


3. Oxybutynin- which is an anticholinergic drug (I had to look that up) that has side effects of drowsiness, visual symptoms and dryness of the mouth.


4. Lastly, you can just have those puppies removed, and by puppies I mean your sweat glands.

Other stuff: There are also cases were Palmar Hyperhidrosis can create devastating emotional effects on a persons life. Most affected people are constantly aware of their clamminess and try to avoid situations were they could possibly be embarrassed. They avoid touching objects and humans. Having a job in culinary would be difficult because they would run the risk of knives slipping out their hands. If they had a job that required a background check they would have a difficult time getting finger prints. They would have to constantly wipe things down if they worked in sales and they would find difficulty playing an instrument.

now, with knowing all that information, i began to double think this little moist problem of mine. (btw i hate to say the word moist, but typing it is not so bad) although it sounds horrible, there is definitely an upside to this. im in an elite group of people. about 2.8% of Americans are affected by Hyperhidrosis. that made me feel special. i began to feel a little better about it and embrace it. i’ll just try to avoid doors, people, fingerprint scanners, computers, cellphones, bottles, pens, animals, food, knives, faucets and humans.

peace

nikki

p.s. as i wrote this i dried my hands approximately 20 times.

 

why are YOU whispering?

i was out to dinner the other night, and the topic of racism in the movie Hunger Games came up. i wasn’t aware of the details of this news so one of the women i was with started to explain it to me. as she started to explain it her voice got really quiet and she continued to speak in a whisper. i immediately became confused. mind you this chick wasn’t black and other than me the only other black person in this Vietnamese restaurant was our friend sitting next to us. so i couldn’t understand why she was whispering. 

when i got home i started to reflect on that conversation and how it went. and as I’m reflecting on it, i couldn’t figure out why this chick whispered when she started talking about racism. i kind of got the feeling that she was either afraid to talk about it or embarrassed to talk about it. which i think is the main problem with some of the non African American race. they think that they have to put the topic of racism on the hush hush and beat around the bush about. to me that’s down playing it and not making it an issue when it needs to be an issue. why did she find it necessary to whisper it? i hope she didn’t think she had to do it for me. i don’t mind having a discussion on racism. i think its healthy. down playing it and making it seem like its not a problem is where i draw the line. 

i wish more people, black or white, would be proactive about discussing the issues of race in America. its sad sometimes that when I’m around a mixed crowd of friends and conversation gets serious voices start to lower and opinions begin to disappear. its sad. but you can’t change everyone. 

but to all my friends and readers who are afraid to talk about racism, try to be more verbal about it. i mean at least show that you care. 

peace

nikki