WHAT IN THE HELL DOES THIS MEAN?!
So I reacted a little crazy to that, but I mean come on. What does that even mean? To make myself seem more available. Should I be wearing a sign that says I’m available? Should I put that as my FB status or tweet it every now and then? That has to be one of the most vague and unnecessary statements anyone has ever made to me. And when they said it, I think I gave them that same response. I actually didn’t want to hear what they had to say, I just forgot about it and went on about my business. Or so I thought.
I found myself thinking about that statement a few days later and still I had no answer to it. To my knowledge I thought I did come off as available. I believe that I give off the “I’m Single.” vibe. I also believe that I have a lot of availability qualities going for myself. I’m a college grad, very active, huge people person, I don’t have anything/ anyone tying me down (i.e. kids, super busy job, family, etc.) and on top of everything I like to believe that I have some great things coming to in the near future. So why am I still single people wonder. That’s just a question that I can’t answer and don’t feel like I have to.
To make things a bit more interesting someone, a male, said to me a while ago that I need to date more often. Now I could have given that person an ear full of four letter words. But instead I said, “You do realize that a decision like that is not up to me to decide. I actually have to be asked out by someone, in order to date more.” I think some men forget that little fact. By the way I use the word more very loosely, because quite frankly I don’t date at all. The hilarious part about all of this is that, none of this bothers me. It bothers others. Yes, other people get uncomfortable by that fact that I don’t date. Crazy, right?
After thinking about that statement I started to think if I had ever asked a guy out. Since I did say that the only way for me to go on a date was for someone to ask me out. It reminded me of Guy from “I Just Want Some Booty Part 1”. I remember one day I got off work early, around the time he did and suggested that we go get some drinks. I thought it was a good idea since he always talked about us doing things together. But he surprisingly turned me down. Well, he actually said, “No thank you, but I would love to go out with you some other time.” (which never happened by the way) That right there was my cue to leave it alone.
Whether I’m being asked out or I’m doing the asking it seems that something is missing in the equation. Cause either way I’m still without a date. But back to the topic at hand, I still don’t have a solution on making myself seem more available. But honestly I think I’m doing a pretty good job with whatever it is that I am doing. If the men that I come in contact with find that I’m not what they are looking for then there is no need to force a connection. And if the people in my life who feel that I don’t do enough to put myself out there then they’ll get over it. I can’t live my life for others and their happiness. If I did that I would be one unhappy chick. And I really don’t have time to be unhappy.
The point is that I can only be myself. I won’t change over night and I won’t change just to make someone interested in me. I’m very confident in who I am and where I’m going. I’m also confident that there is a man who will be just as confident in me as I am in myself.
So to anyone who thinks that I’m not doing enough and I need to make myself seem more available…chill out please and have a cupcake.
nikki
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