Showing posts with label girlfriend. Show all posts
Showing posts with label girlfriend. Show all posts

Monday, December 16, 2013

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Hurry Up and Get Married!

At what age should a woman get married? Is it right out out college? Before 30? This question has to be the bane of my existence. Since college all I hear from friends, family, colleagues, random grocery store clerks and even coworkers is when am I going to get married. It's a question that is damn near annoying and invasive. In case these people didn't now, I am not God. I cannot see into the future nor have I ever been good at placing bets. So the little five word question that they feel necessary to muster from their lips should stay within the confines of their brain.

I realize that I sound pretty angry but I have every right to feel this way. Let me explain. I can count on both hands and feet how many high and college classmates who are either engaged, married, or married with a kid (including puppies). Double that number and that's how many times I've been asked about my marital future. That's 39 times too many in my opinion. The insane part of all of this is that  I am not even in a relationship. I'm just as fresh as a hot pan of country cornbread. I haven't had a boyfriend in the past four years. That number may seem pretty high to some people, but I take who I commit myself to very seriously. So I just don't call every guy I talk to my boyfriend after a week of texting and emoticons.  I prefer to take my time and really get to know the person I am considering to be my life partner.Life partner? NappyNikki you were just talking about dating, how did you get to life partner? Well, in my opinion the whole dating game is about finding that one true partner. Whether people want to admit it or not that's everyone's goal.

I am 24 years old, I've had 1 serious boyfriend and maybe dated, a term I use very loosely, 3 guys. And now everyone I know assumes that is is time for me to settle down, get married and start making mini me's. Just the other day a few coworkers asked me if I ever thought about it and if I hadn't I need to soon. I'm only 24 years old! Just shy of my quarter life crisis' mark. What's the rush? Why do I need to do it right now? Is the Messiah coming? Is there a shortage of men? If so, will those same people start encouraging me to marry a woman? (Not that I am against it.) All I'm saying is that if you are going to advise someone to do something, you better give them a good reason why. And even them I'm not going to move at the pace you want me to.

Now, by no means am I against marriage. I very well would love to enjoy and experience that agape love. I want a family and just recently realized that I want children. I want everything that people question me about on a daily basis and more. However, I don't want it to be forced. I don't want to feel like I have to marry someone just because we have dated for more than 5 years. Or have a baby because my biological clock is ticking and I definitely don't want to feel as if I have to marry someone just because they got me pregnant. This is not a movie where I had a one night stand with some random guy from a bar, he got be pregnant and now we have to force a relationship that probably never would have happen it if weren't for six shots of tequila and outraged hormones. This is my life and I take it very seriously.

So to all those lovely souls who wish me a never ending magical Disney fairy tale filled with lots of kids, baked goods and and endless supply of sappy moments. Pump your breaks! Let there be a boyfriend before you start picking out wedding dresses and nursery colors.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

bob vs. nature

Im always interested in knowing what peoples views are about adult toys. I come across many people who are afraid to talk about it, let alone think about it. One of my favorite R&B artist, Raheem DeVaughn, has a song called B.O.B, meaning battery operated boyfriend. In his song he talks about how a real man is better than a b.o.b. He has a few valid points. But I don’t know any man that would disagree with him. After listening to his song, I questioned whether Raheem was right. Now don’t get me wrong I enjoy a strong manly man’s loving just as much as the next straight woman. But when I’m not in a monogamous relationship, the real type of love that Raheem sings about is very much absent in my life. And single or not the body wants what the body wants. So in my opinion bob is sometimes better than the real thing. There are many benefits to having a bob. 1. You don’t have to worry about low performance. 2. There is no worry of sexually transmitted diseases. 3. No worries about satisfaction. I mean those are just a few among many, but you can see where I’m going. When a woman isn’t in a relationship, she should be free to perform self pleasure without the worries of someone else judging or looking down on her. Of course she isn’t going to be announcing it to the world, but among a group of girlfriends she should feel free. This topic is one that will forever be debated among men and women forever. Just thought Id put my opinion in.


Peace


Nikki